Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Touring Nazlet Samaan



Asalamu Alaykom,



It was a hard day yesterday

(Morsi trial, no morning bus pick-up AND no notice that there would be no pick-up, 21 LE taxi ride, ornery kids who wanted the day off, substitution duty for the teachers too scared to come in, finding out that my kid went to detention for non-stop laughing, missing the afternoon bus, demanding that we be on that bus, stressing at not knowing where the impromptu route was going to drop us off, being in a tuk-tuk and not knowing exactly where I was and not being able to tell my husband that information on the phone and getting yelled at.)


I had to have a better day today.

I grabbed the camera and headed out with my husband to buy tumaya.  We were going on a short walking tour of Nazlet Samaan to help me remember why the hell I love Egypt and want to live here.



Door frame painted in the Egyptian flag colors with bloody hand prints from Eid.




Wall with pictures indicating that the family inside went on Hajj.




Picture indicating that the family inside loves Sisi...



A LOT!



Sleepy cat



Loved the curlicues; hated the stench of the garbage.  You can't see it but I still smell it.  



I love doors in Egypt.



I also love cauliflower.  We bought a small one for 4 LE.  The seller started at 10 LE.



This fancy home was used as a location in the 60's for a popular TV drama about a family who digs up their floor in order to find ancient treasure.



Yes, that is a peacock on the roof.  I want one too.




Same fancy house.  Love it.




This is on the back roads to the Pyramids.



As far as you can go towards the Pyramids from Nazlet Samaan.




Last house in the village.



Love all the curves.




It was morning and there were more cats than people out and about.




Did I mention that I love the doors?




Doors tell us of possibilities; suggest of thresholds we could cross into new worlds.




I adore this verdigris.



There are no tourists, so I was the only one noticing this papyrus of Surah Yassin.




These are papyrus plants growing outside the shop.  I love the blue and gold together in the background.



Islamic tiling designs and pro-military.  This is Egypt!  My hub said that this poster was supporting the military and the police.  I told him that it looked like they were fighting each other.  He couldn't see that.  Can you?



The government subsidized bakery and Sisi.  Lots of Sisi.  There were levels above of more Sisi but I didn't take those pictures.  A man walked over to us and started telling me who Sisi was and then started his military-in-Egypt spiel.  It made me nervous.  Basically, a fight can break out in Egypt at any time.  I'm not joking.



Here's the close-up I took right before we walked away.  I asked my hub if he was scared from the man talking to us and he said he wasn't.



Here's the tumaya shop.  Yes, that's my hub's hand holding our ticket.




Who wouldn't like seeing this as a possible breakfast?  I have loved falafel/tumaya since college.



Then all hell broke loose.  We're going through a cooking gas canister shortage here, so when this massive truck drove through the neighborhood, people stopped and stared.  It wasn't just the one truck.  




There was a smaller truck.  Here's that driver answering a woman's questions.  There was also a parade of vehicles following behind since they wanted to be first in line.  Everyone around us pulled out their mobiles and began calling.  About three minutes later, an elderly man on a bike sped by with a used canister.  His son worked the other tumaya shop and yelled at him to hurry.  We all  laughed.

As we began our walk home, I saw two women in galabiyas carrying empty canisters on their heads.  I wanted to take their picture but I didn't. Imagine how strong and determined they were to run out of their homes and down the road in order to help their families.  God bless them.




Goats and meat




Morsi meets Warhol.  I love this picture.  It actually sings of the presidency of Morsi from shiny and new to broken and shabby.  The inhabitants are either very brave or very forgetful.  I was a little scared to take the picture. 



Another cool door, right?




Colors!  I I love how decorative this cart was.  The most green you will see is on these carts carrying animal feed.



Turnips.



Sadly, turnips aren't the only purple in our village.  This apartment building is hideously kinky.



Carving up a camel.  It's got a strange juxtaposition to it, doesn't it?


Life is beautiful, strange, colorful, exciting, scary, and surprising.  Egypt has always felt more alive than any other country I've been.  It isn't always "nice" and that's when I'm not happy.  I am, however, still able to find the good outweighing the bad.  

May it always be so.

Friday, October 11, 2013

Crippled Muslim Men



Asalamu Alaykom,




Crippled Muslim Men

The man with the slow and unsteady gait
hurries on his way through streets
knowing the azan is coming.

Each shuffle with his half-limp body
moves him closer to the prayer hall,
believing it is his obligation to Allah.

I watch him from my window sill,
watch how he cannot keep a straight line,
yet he is following The Best Path.

Many a "Muslim" man stays at home,
rests his body all through Jummah
never admitting he's losing his stride.


Tuesday, September 3, 2013

I Was Sad Because I Had No Shoes


Asalamu Alaykom,





Rarely have I watched a 4-minute video and had it stay in my mind as much as this video.  I talked about it to my son when he was whining.  I referenced it again tonight.

My husband's teenage niece was crying because she can't go out at night.  This isn't because her mom is over protective it's because the girl is losing her eyesight to Retinitious Pigmentosa and can't see well enough to navigate safely.  Her older brother has the same problem.  It's been going on for years and it will keep going until they are blind.  Yes, there is a real reason why you should not marry your cousin.

So, I told this girl how everyone has a problem.  She can't leave the house at night because she can't see well.  I can't leave the house at night because I'm not Egyptian.  I told her how there's a beautiful girl at school who seems to have everything yet she has lost her mom.  Don't wish to trade your life with another.

That's what this video is about.  It's short and bittersweet.  I recommend it for kids (and grown-ups) who complain about their life.

The phrase, "I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man with no feet," is very old and it has Muslim origins.    WikiAnswers has more information:

This quote is most certainly based on poetry from the Gulistan,  "Rose Garden" of [Persian poet] Sa'di. The book is from 1259 CE, so this will predate any other attribution out there.  

The original source for this saying reads: 


I never lamented about the vicissitudes of time or complained of the turns of fortune except on the occasion when I was barefooted and unable to procure slippers. But when I entered the great mosque of Kufah with a sore heart and beheld a man without feet I offered thanks to the bounty of God, consoled myself for my want of shoes and recited: 'A roast fowl is to the sight of a satiated man Less valuable than a blade of fresh grass on the table And to him who has no means nor power A burnt turnip is a roasted fowl.'

By the way, two million Syrian refugees would probably love to trade places with you and your family right now.  Say, an "alhumdulillah," for whatever you thought you were suffering and a "Ya Rab!" for those who have it worse.





Tuesday, June 11, 2013

The Seven Habits of a Highly Effective Ramadan


Asalamu Alaykom,






Stephen R. Covey (Allah yerhamo) wrote "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People."  He was not Muslim.  To my knowledge, this business guru never wrote any advice on how to better your month of fasting and devotion.  Let's, therefore, take his beneficial way of organizing our lives into healthy habits and apply them to this Pillar of Islam.

It is completely sensible to do this, since Ramadan itself is all about improving ourselves and establishing better habits.  Many Muslims make resolutions to quit self-defeating behavior and adapt healthier lifestyles during the month.  That dream of being a better Muslim needs a plan; it can't just stay as a lofty aspiration.  Stephen R. Covey's "Seven Habits" can be a step-by-step plan for us this Ramadan.

He believed that first we have to work inwardly on three issues; without them as our base, we can't continue upward and achieve all that we want.


Habit 1


Be Proactive

We plan so much of our lives, yet we resist planning our religious life.  We tend to feel as if our thirsty spirit will be replenished when God intervenes; much like a waiter ready with a pitcher of ice water for the moment our glass of iman is half empty.  Astragferallah.  We are not helpless consumers.  We need to be hopeful and active participants in our lives.  We can be proactive.

Let's plan our Ramadan!  Stop finding reasons why our Ramadan can't be a success.  Be stronger than your excuses.  

Don't tell me that Ramadan would be better if only...

I was back home.
I lived in a Muslim country.
I didn't have so many responsibilities.
I had a more supportive family.
I wasn't a new Muslim.
I was a better Muslim.
I wasn't pregnant.
I wasn't nursing.
I wasn't on that medication.
I wasn't so alone.

Those are all excuses and  predetermined failures.  To be highly effective, you need to envision a successful environment for your iman to take root and grow.  Islam can flourish in any soul and in any country so ask Allah to make it possible in you, as you are and exactly where you are.  No, you won't have 100% success. You will fall short because we all do.  Will you achieve better results if you set goals and concrete steps to avoid the usual setbacks?  Of course!

Look around you.  What is it that clutters up your life?  This could be the tangible, such as disorganized piles of papers, or intangible, such as sadness over what can't be.  Be realistic right now.  Admit that we reap what we sow, or in other words we need to put time and effort into the planning.

Here's an example from my own life:  In Egypt, we've been having more than our fair share of power failures.    I've been feeling fearful of how that's going to affect fasting this summer.  It's going to make it harder.  It's going to be be a even more difficult task without electricity (and water since we rely on an electric pump).  We will be suffering.  Those are all the negative messages I've been compounding inside me.  I'm a victim of Egypt's unstable infrastructure!  What can I do?

As a reader, you can see my problem from a detached distance.  That's a good place to view problems and remember that for every problem there is a solution.  No, I can't control electricity.  I can, however, schedule my activities better so that the power cuts affect me less.  I can set up systems (such as demanding Mr. Boo's floor and bed be cleared off before dinner) to lessen the impact of suddenly being without light.  I can guard against being without water by having means to store it (and to keep my clothes and dishes clean a little at a time rather than waiting for some magically perfect time to do them all).

There will be problems this Ramadan.  Some of those problems seem to happen every year.  Those old problems are what hold us back from looking forward to a new chance of connecting to our blessings.  Likewise, the new challenges we are imagining are allowing fear to stop us from moving forward.  Being proactive means that you admit your Ramadan will never be perfect but you can make it the best you can by identifying issues and addressing them beforehand.


Habit 2


Begin with the End in Mind

Let's not talk about Ramadan.  Let's talk about Eid.  Who do you want by this Eid Al-Fitr?  Which Ramadan accomplishments do you want to look back on?  Is there a memory you want to hold dear?  Go ahead and ask yourself those questions now.  You cannot know the sweetest of success on Eid without identifying  how you define success before Ramadan even begins.

Stop planning the first day of Ramadan and plan the last instead.  Stop assuming that there is only one way to handle the month.  Stop allowing others to dictate to you what your Ramadan will be.  Remember that this Habit 2 is inward.  You decide who you want to be by the end of Ramadan.  Don't discuss this with anyone or ask permission from anyone.  You keep this private between you and Allah.

Admit to Allah that you are not where you want to be in your deen.  No one is.  Visualize the Muslim you want to be and who you are now.  There's a gap.  Use the journey of Ramadan to lessen that gap.  What are the steps you'd need to get closer to your ideal self?  Maybe you'll have to rethink preconceived notions of what your Ramadan is.

There isn't really one "right" Ramadan.  Some years, we need to focus on family life but during others we need to focus on ourselves.  Many advocate reading Quran many times over during Ramadan but there is much to be said about slowly savoring each Surah.  Which way is right?  It really depends on what you need to reach your goals.  If you feel closed in and out of touch with the community, then this might be the year to investigate helping others.  For someone who is constantly learning about Islam, maybe Ramadan can be a time to balance that knowledge with doing.

Life is often about maintaining a balance.  In what way can Ramadan re-right your equilibrium?  If you've been going too far in one direction, think of what would bring you back to center.  The calm core of our center is where we find our peace and that is where Islam dwells within us.  How can you find your peace this Ramadan?


Habit 3


Put First Things First

What is first in our life?  As Muslims, there is no other answer but Allah.  There is no god but God.  We cannot do anything in Ramadan which robs us of our chance to connect to Allah.  Our time is so precious and our wish is so sincere.  We really need to fight against the temptation to be with the world when we can be with Our Lord.

Sometimes, we willingly walk away from God.  Other times, we are pulled away.  Either way, we have to remain steadfast this Ramadan that our most important relationship is with Ar-Rahman, Ar-Raheem.



The next set of habits cannot be done alone.  You have to reach out and to gain from outside sources.  Subhanallah, our Prophet of Islam (peace be upon him) couldn't stay alone in the Cave of Hira.  We too need interactions to stay dynamic as Muslims.

Habit 4


Think Win-Win

Though I've written a lot about doing what's good for you and your iman, don't think that all others in your life are going to suffer.  They don't have to.  You can truly figure out compromises which take into account everyone's needs.  Some days are more about you and your needs and some days are more about someone else.  Though this month is about connecting you to your faith, it probably won't be a 30-day lone retreat in the wilderness.  Most of us live and work with others and need to be realistic about our connections and responsibilities.  Over the course of a month, though, everyone can have their time and their needs met.

Moms need to think about the ways to raise children during Ramadan which produce the best results.  How can I observe the month-long fast and still be an effective mother?  For me, I really need to involve Mr. Boo in the suhour, the fasting, the iftars, the memorization, the prayers and the charity.  I also want to build in some scheduled days for activity (like going to the school's library once a week).  If I help him, then the days will go smoother than him vegetating in front of the television.  He will be weakened from a fast until asr but this will benefit him (as he prepares to be a man) and me (as I can't handle him at full strength while I'm feeling depleted).  We both win. He gets attention and time from me at set times and then I get peace when I need to rest.

If I look ahead to the end of Ramadan (Habit 2), I will feel better about myself, my son, and our family if I've put in places ways to care for his needs.  Ignoring what others need means that I am setting myself up for failure.  There is time now to set up win-win situations so that everyone has a meaningful Ramadan.


Habit 5


Seek First to Understand, 
Then to Be Understood

I need to understand more about Quran, Sunnah, Hadith and the history of Islam and so do you.  I can say that without ever meeting you. I can say that because it's true for all of us.  Knowledge during Ramadan doesn't have to be limited.  You can study anything which helps you understand The Creator or the creation better.  Every new realization moves you closer.

What is on your reading list?  Have you ever read a biography of The Prophet of Islam (peace be upon him)?  Ramadan is a great time to get closer to The Messenger.  For women especially, it's good for us to learn about the early women in Islam---like the first follower of Islam, Khadija (ra) and the first martyr of Islam, Sumaya (ra).

I've been teaching about the Ummayads in Al-Andalus and I'd highly recommend learning about Abdur-Rahman Ibn Muwiaya.  His grandfather Hisham had been a Caliph and he narrowly escaped to Spain in order to establish a unified nation.  Subhanallah.

If the idea of "The 7 Habits" intrigues you, then consider learning more about it.  I like that there's a book for teens and for school-aged children as well.  The whole family could start using this model!

Where is your curiosity?  That is the core of your being nudging you to learn more so follow where your curiosity leads you.  Every bit of knowledge is a gain this Ramadan.


Habit 6


Synergize

Who is on your Ramadan team?  Think of the people you want around you; your dream team.  How can you share and support each other during the month?  They don't have to be Muslim.  They simply have to love you and want the best for you.

If you're married, then think of you and your spouse can share moments together.  One thing I really like is that first kiss after breaking the fast.  It's sweet!  It's sweet because you could have smooched earlier but you didn't because you're Muslim.  Other couples like to go out for a short walk between finishing their tea and going to Taraweah prayers.

Is there someone with whom you have been out of touch?  If you miss them, then consider arranging a meet up during Ramadan.  Share food together and pray together.

There are some people you need to avoid.  Be realistic.  You can't move ahead if you have someone who pulls you back or pulls you down.  It's worth mentioning that if you can't rely on that person during Ramadan, you might not want them in your life as a close ally during the other times of the year either.


Lastly, the Seventh Habit is a way to maintain the previous six.

Habit 7  
Sharpen the Saw

There is less energy in Ramadan so you have to be careful with your reserves.  How are you going to stay balanced?  "Sharpening the saw," means that while you do all the work towards success,  you cannot get depleted to nothingness.  You have to maintain yourself and sense of self.

One example from my life is how I couldn't listen to Quran non-stop.  I couldn't!  Years ago, I made the commitment to not listen to music during Ramadan.  That feels better to me to cut out all songs during the day.  However, I found myself needing something so I turned to nasheeds.  RadioIslam has some great programs I would listen to.  Another person would say that's wrong but I knew that it improved my mood and kept me going through the month.

We know what we need better than someone else.  Don't let anyone "should" on you.  A month is a long time to pretend so don't pretend that you don't have needs that aren't being met.

Another example might be the revert who doesn't feel connected to Ramadan the way she used to with Christmas time.  She decides to do some baking and share it with others.  Some Muslims feel that baking cookies during Ramadan is mimicking the Christians and therefore is wrong.  That's fine for them to think so for themselves, but it might actually save a new Muslim from leaving Islam.  To each his or her own.  All of us need to get through Ramadan our own way.

 By the same token, we need to be kind about how others are getting through their days and nights.  It's not our job to judge how our brothers and sisters handle their Ramadan.  I can't tell you the number of times a sister has been made fun of because she wore hijab during the month, though she doesn't normally.  Whatever!  Leave her alone!  She is doing her life the best she can.  Be gracious. Be loving.  Love and accept others the way that you hope God will love and accept you and your fasting.

As I write this, I'm hearing Quran being recited from down the street.  An elderly neighborhood man passed away today.  It was just last week he sat with my husband; they talked and laughed together.  He was a friend of the father-in-law I never met.  From Allah we come, and to Allah we return.  Men die.  People die.  We all die.

This Ramadan could be our last.  Let's be sober enough to realize how finite life is.  Ramadan is a chance to purify ourselves and our lives.  It's a beautiful chance; it's a gift from God.  Don't waste it.  Don't have regrets.  Use it to get closer to The Truth and to understand deeper how you can serve Allah.  Find a way to join with others in this purpose and to remain hopeful that one month can make a difference.  Yes, this Ramadan could be our last but it could also be the first in a glorious fresh start.

Inshahallah.






Thursday, May 9, 2013

Rush Hour in Nazlet Samaan


Asalamu Alaykom,



It was right before rush hour today when my bus driver decided to take a shortcut through one of Nazlet Samaan's little side streets. He was going to hurry so he could drop off his last three passengers.  Around the corner he went.  There, in front of him was a slow moving, horse drawn carriage.  My little neighborhood next to the Pyramids is known for its camel and horse stables.  This was not what the driver needed.

At first, I only saw the carriage through the windshield.  The driver honked and I saw the real problem.  Walking behind the carriage was another horse.  He wasn't moving along with his master in the carriage with the lead horse.  This other horse had stopped and was standing still.  We were bumper to backside.

The driver wasn't having any of this nonsense.  It was Thursday afternoon and he had somewhere else to be!  He honked the horn, as if a horse obeys the laws of the road.  The horse just stood there.  After a split second, the driver honked the horn again and stayed on it longer this time.

The horse responded.  He slowly lifted up his tail and indicated exactly what he thought of the driver's antics.  The driver quickly backed up the minibus.  He waited at a safe distance until the horse finished his business.  The driver wasn't going to honk any more. The horse had the last turd word.



Sunday, April 7, 2013

Meeting Amr


Asalamu Alaykom,



Recently, a friend of mine made the hard decision to leave Egypt.  She would be leaving the place she's made into a home for the last three years.  She would also be leaving a man she's come to love.  Basically, she's changed her whole life because she fell in love with an Egyptian.

Men!  They certainly do pull us women.  We love to feel needed by a man.  Our whole view of reality seems to change incrementally as we get closer to that testosterone.

For me, there's a moment I keep in my mind in order to keep my life in perspective.  I was attending my first wedding party in Egypt.  It was a big affair in a rooftop party room.  Every cousin in my husband's family was there and so were two Americans.  Americans?!

Yes, two American women were hanging out at the wedding too.  Of course, with me being who I am, I had to walk over and find out who they were.  Turns out that they were just visiting Egypt when they met cousin Amr.  He bumped into them on the street.

If you know the tourist business at all, then you know that no one bumps into anyone.  It's all carefully planned helpfulness.  They didn't know that.  Those two ladies on break from their medical studies were very book smart but not very street smart.

We talked over the huge journey they'd been on.  They'd seen so much and done so much.  They had traveled more of Egypt than I had.  So, I wanted to ask, "What was the best part?"

"Meeting Amr!"

That was a shocker.  I found that answer to be very sad.  These two women had planned and scrimped and saved to make this trip.  They'd seen the Pyramids, the Nile, and the King Tut jewels.  They'd ridden a camel, eaten grilled chicken under palm trees and swam in the Red Sea.  Their entire itinerary crossed my mind and I had to double-check so I asked, "Meeting Amr?"

"Yes, it was such an unexpected surprise!" Blurted out the one woman who seemed more interested in Amr than the other.

I stifled the urge to add, "Only to you!  He talks to tourists every day!"

They were blissfully unaware and happy.  So, I warned them not to drink from the bottles of tap water masquerading as bottled water on the center of every table.  They nodded thankfully and I walked away.  I had kept them safe from one danger at least.

I have no idea what the end to their adventure was.  I never asked cousin Amr.  He stopped by the other day and I heard his loud voice float up the stairs.  I'm sure he's a nice guy.  He was an opportunist then, but with very few tourists these days, I wonder who he talks to now.

The story of Amr's tourist women has stayed with me in a sad, cautionary way.  I don't want to be the woman who sees the whole wonderful world but is cheered the most by a rather ordinary man.  I want to be fulfilled by my life adventure and not get so side-tracked by a man that I forget my purpose in being here.  I am enough and my story is enough without a man.

That doesn't mean that I don't like my man; I do like him!  I even love him (when he's lovable).  However, he is not the reason for my being in Egypt---he never was and he never will be.  I came here on hijrah in order to be closer to my faith.  My priority needs to remain my journey and not my man.

It isn't very romantic to love God more than your man.  It's horribly unromantic to love yourself more than your guy.  Yet, it's real and honest.  We need to be mature women standing firmly on the ground instead of being girls getting swept off our feet by crazy love and infatuation.

My friend will be leaving her man in Egypt and I think it's a great decision.  They never married.  They've had their time and it's not going any where beyond this moment.  A moment does not a life make.  She needs to build her life for the very real future.  He's not about the future; he's going to be pulling her down to stay stuck in the "now".

Let's love our times with our men but not above our sensibilities.  We deserve our lives more than they do.  Remembering, of course, that our lives are here for us to serve Allah Subhana Wa Tala.







Sunday, March 24, 2013

على_طريق_الله Ala Tarek Allah


Asalamu Alaykom,



This is the Mustafa Hosny show, "Ala Tarek Allah," from Al-Nahar.  He introduces me at the 32 minute mark.

I'll work on getting an accurate translation of what he says about me.  If any of you feel capable of doing that for me, I'd sure appreciate it.  

I speak for about five minutes.

You'll see pictures I gave the producers.  The first picture is me as a baby after my baptism with my mom and dad.  Then, you'll see my dad along with Mr. Boo. I'm disappointed you don't see the pictures of my mom and I; there was one of us at her church and one of her from our last visit to America.  Instead, you will see Mr. Boo and I under an Egyptian flag when we first got here.  You'll see me in front of the Sphinx and Mr. Boo and I on our roof with the Pyramids in the background.  You'll see me with kindergarten kids here in Egypt and with my first graders from America.  The last two photos are from when Mr. Boo was little.  If you keep watching, you'll see us with a tall, dark and goofy guy.

Of course, there was more that I said but it was edited down.  I hope that what was shown in the video is helpful somehow.

Let me know what you think and feel.

Friday, March 22, 2013

MeTube


Asalamu Alaykom,




That's me on Egyptian TV.  It's not the big interview for Al-Nahar; that's airing tomorrow on Saturday, March 23 at 11 pm (and again Sunday, March 24 at 11 am).

This is me from January, 2011 before the Revolution.  I was interviewed for a segment on Cherifa Aboul Fettouh's nutrition show.  If you're trying to find me, it's about six minutes into the program and then twice more after that.  Yes, I speak in Arabic and of course it doesn't sound quite right.

Enjoy what you can.