Saturday, May 9, 2009

Babysitting Except with a House


I really was at my wit's end yesterday. Seriously, thought I might go insane. I literally cried off and on for two hours.



I have been given a chance at house sitting for two months. I could leave my mom's and alll the issues here and just go BE at my lovely friend's beautiful place. I prayed istakkarah about it and so far it feels great.

Mom is happy with it.

AbuBoo is mad about it.

The man I've been talking to (ya, I know) lives an hour away from that spot. He's thrilled.

What about YOU?


Shabana said...

Subhanallah, sounds like Allah answered your duas. It sounds like it came in the nick of time. Alhamdulillah!

Um Zakarya said...

Assalamu aleykum,

Go for it sister!Allah SWT is the best of planners.

Lot of love.

Yosra said...

Asalamu Alaykom Shabana,

Ya, amazing, eh? I kid you not!

Asalamu Alaykom Um Zakarya,

I think I'm going for it, ya baby!

And now for something completely different...

Hey, just to clarify for an anonymous commentator who, "didn't want to judge," but managed to say I showed poor judgement AND low iman. LOL!

Um, AbuBoo is mad because he wants to spend more time with his son. I briefly considered his feelings on the issue and then realized that he gave up having a wife and son on a daily basis when he went for a divorce. And then, I cemented the resolve to be fine with leaving, by remembering those 11 months he was out of the country when his son was two years old and needing him.

As for me, "flirting," I am in marriage discussions with a solidly good guy right now. Early days, but this man did his hajj, does his prayers, volunteers at the local masjid, educates his children in Islam and strives to be halal in all his thoughts and actions.

If you meant I was "flirting" with AbuBoo, then astragferallah. If I was flirting then may Allah forgive me. If I was not, then may Allah forgive you. My intention is to make it through times of togetherness without losing my mind or my heart.

I want to give my son (and my daugher who was along) the understanding that we can still love each other as a family. We are a family. He is the father of my child and I am the mother of his child. That child was created out of love and to flip to hate now is not what I want for my life. It is a love for the sake of Allah, and then for the sake of the children. Alhumdulillah, it sure seems healthier :)

AbuBoo does NOT know about the new man. Of course I do not rub it in his face. He is not a person to feel jealous of any man with me. He wants the best for me, as whatever happens to me then also happens to our son.

I'm not sure, Anonymous, if you are a first-time visitor or a long-time reader. I will say that you could use an attitude adjustment. Ask Allah for help in this and then come back and see me again.

I wish you all the best.

Colleen said...

Salaams Yosra - Well, if you believe in signs, this is one. It's amazing how things just fall into your lap at the right moment. I think it's great. If you feel good about it, then you should do it. As for AbuBoo, well, he needs to get over it. You are doing what you think is right for Mr Boo, but also to save your sanity from being with your mom. As for this other guy that you have been talking to...well, he sounds great. Take it slow, but remember that you are leaving (that is still the plan, right?). Is it best to start something that could lead into something bigger? Something to ponder.

As for this anonymous, it sound like this person doesn't have the slightest clue about having a good relationship with your ex husband (and father to your son). I don't believe you were flirting, just having a good time and making the best out of the situation. Sometimes people don't understand that you CAN have that. That you can even be friendly without going over that line to where it becomes more (aka flirting). That you don't have to be mean and hateful that most people do have for their ex's. This person seems very "I don't want to judge, but I am going to do it anyways" type of person. People need to look to themselves first before judging others. And most of all, Allah (SWT) is the best judge of all.

Yosra, just take it with a grain of salt. Most people who say this are miserable in their own lives and like to bring others down as well.

I hope you have a wonderful Mother's Day.

Salaams and Hugs!

Yosra said...

Wa Alaykom Asalam Wa Rahtmatuallahi Wa Barakatu Colleen,

You give such great comments! Thanks!

I was going to give you this hugely long response back but it got LOOOOOOOOOOOST in the posting. Arrrrrgh...So! That's going to be another SIGN that it wasn't meant to be :)

So, let me just say that YES, I agree about signs.

Yes, I agree I gotta get outta here and I just agreed to it today.

Yes, I agree that it might not be wise to get involved with anyone now. However, I just stay open to goodness and let God work it out.

Yes, I agree about Anonymous and I wish her the best but...

no, I just wish her the best.

And I wish all ya Mothas a Happy Sun-Shiny, (Relatively)Stress-free Mother's Day.

Anisah said...

This sounds like a good way to have your own place for a little bit, and get a break from your mom. It would be different if you were leaving the country or something, but AbuBoo really doesn't have a say in what you do or where you go, nor in if you remarry. It's not his business.