Saturday, November 29, 2008

Holding a Baby

Yesterday, I was given the extreme privledge of holding a baby.

My friend came over and when her cell rang, I got to sneak the baby out of her arms.

I had already asked Mr. Boo if that would be alright with him.

She was truly that little bundle of joy. Her downy fluff of hair soft against my check. Her baby smell. Her tiny fingers grabbing mine.

Babies stop the world.

They do.

You hold a baby and you don't remember ills, bills, hurts, worries, fears, or any headline.

At the same time, I know that I don't wish for any more children. I don't. I have searched my mind and, even if my body is able, my mind can't fathom it.

There are men who talk to me about marriage. Some of those men want to have their own children. Nice men. And as nice as they are, I like myself more. I don't want any more children. Really. And I let those nice men walk away.

At the end of my friend's phone call, I got to give the baby back. I got to hug my toddler dude. That felt very special too. He could hug me back.

He's the only dude hugging me now.


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